Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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