i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
