how can u be prego again
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Randomize
