Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
