physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
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