singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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