when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
