So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize