when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
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