Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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