i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Life is so much better after having sex.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
