So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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