Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
