i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
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