One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Randomize
