Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
