I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
i out mim tonsoeep
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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