I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Randomize
