6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize