how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
