Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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