Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
where does the pee come out of this thing
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
