no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
