worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
