Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Holy sore nipples Batman
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
