just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
