I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
