Christians are straight up FREAKS
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
