so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize