Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
Randomize
