All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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