Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
