have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
