ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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