whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Randomize
