I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
