He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
