His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize