gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Randomize
