Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
