you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Randomize
