member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Come see our sink grown plant.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
