so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Randomize
