Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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