I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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