yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Randomize