so that wasnt chicken after all
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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