Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
