I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
You may now shotgun with the bride
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
