We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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