They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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