It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
